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Ollanta agrandará el sueldo “mínimo” a “recontramínimamenteinsignificante”

Ollanta agrandará el sueldo “mínimo” a “recontramínimamenteinsignificante”

Luego del Mensaje Presidencial, el esposo de Nadine Heredia recapacitó y anunció con bombos y platillos que atenderá el principal reclamo de la ciudadanía: incrementar el sueldo mínimo.

Desde mañana, según Ollanta Humala, el sueldo mínimo será mayor y pasará de “mínimo” a “recontramínimamenteinsignificante” y afirmó que espera que con ello los peruanos estén contentos porque ya está cansado de tanto malagradecido.

“Al principio dudé, pero gracias a mis asesores, he decidido esta medida que acelerará las inversiones y hará que el dinero gire como si fuese Navidad y 28 de Julio al mismo tiempo”, dijo el presidente mientras hacía transacciones vía Internet.

“Yo quería llamarlo ‘sueldo minion’, pero Nadine no me dejó. Dijo que era un poco inmaduro. Pero, a ver, si soy inmaduro, ¿entonces Grú también lo es? ¿Cómo puede serlo y ser tan malo a la vez?”, dijo mientras abrazaba un peluche que tenía forma de Cáceres.

Por fuentes cercanas, nos enteramos de que además el Presidente aumentará el sueldo a sus ministros, los congresistasa recibirán 20 sueldos y los que estaban en planillas pasarán a terceros para que la Sunat los enyuque a todos.

Mientras tanto, se supo también que en diciembre los empresarios lo condecorarán como el “Hombre del Año” y los pulpines que trabajan en DL2 seguirán recibiendo solo para sus pasajes. Seguiremos informando.

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