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Ollanta Humala anuncia envío de buques de guerra a Bolivia para repatriar a Belaúnde Lossio

Ollanta Humala anuncia envío de buques de guerra a Bolivia para repatriar a Belaúnde Lossio

[Agencia Huáscar] Tiene los días contados. El Presidente de todos los peruanos y también de los europeos misios que vienen aquí por la crisis de allá, Ollanta Humala, informó que “al Gobierno le interesa capturar a Belaúnde Lossio y por eso ha ordenado a la Marina de Guerra del Perú traer al prófugo para que rinda cuentas a la justicia. Hemos enviado dos buques de guerra para asegurar la repatriación”.

Según Humala, Belaúnde estaría en Lima en una semana o en en los próximos 30 años, según el comportamiento del mar y si es que Chile por fin le ofrece salida al mar al Alto Perú hermano país limítrofe. Los buques tienen por nombre “La Tortuga Asesina” y “El Caracol Furioso”.

“Estamos seguros que Bolivia no se interpondrá en esta medida. Nuestro buques tienen la seguridad necesaria y de paso verán si Chile ya desalojó el ‘Triángulo Terrestre’ que no quieren dejar pese a la sentencia de La Haya. En ese pedacito podemos, no sé, abrir una bodega o lo que sea para aprovecharlo al máximo. Quizás una cárcel exclusiva para los pulpines disidentes”, expresó Humala, mientras limpiaba los zapatos de Nadine.

Mientras tanto, al preguntarle sobre esta medida al presidente boliviano Evo Morales, señaló que “mi servicio de inteligencia me tiene muy bien informado respecto a Belaunde Lossio: entregaremos a ese señor que tanto daño le ha hecho al Perú y dejó que se expanda el terrorismo en los 80s, ahora hace lobbies y es un corrupto conocido. Eso no lo vamos a permitir en Bolivia. Ojalá que pronto lleguen los carabineros de Perú para llevárselo”.

Por su parte, la presidenta de Chile, Michelle Bachelet expresó que “Chile le dará mar a Bolivia por Tacna o Arequipa cuando terminemos de comprar todos los puertos peruanos. Falta poco para ello. Eso sí, a cambio solo queremos un pedacito del guano del lago Titicaca y no se les ocurra subirnos un centavo por quintal, sino ya lo saben”. Seguiremos informando desde el Hito Número 1 de la Concordia de la Pascana del Hueso, cruce con la avenida Brasil.

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45 de Comentariosen este Artículo

  1. Quien carajo es Humala.. Fuck Belaunde cut his fingers and dig please.. and stick them out in his ass.

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